To be pushed and pulled—taken under the surf just long enough to appreciate what’s good in this life—is the only constant pitter-patter we all face.

It’s moved along by time and more commonly known as changeTaking it for granted is all too easy. Acquaintances, friends, loved ones. We try our best to keep our heads up and recognize the good all around.

An old As Tall as Lions track reminds me of this struggle as it relates to love:

Tell me how come no one gets what they really want,
And love only when it’s convenient?
We act like we know more than we know,
We treat love like it’s something you own.

It is at the moment that we think we have everything figured out that we at once realize that we certainly do not, and that there are still many lessons to come.

I recently looked into both of their eyes.

The eyes of the past as she walked away like the wind ushering leaves along fall’s endless track. She was no longer who I know, but rather who I thought I knew.

It boiled down to an image, of an idea, from a time.

Then I looked into her eyes, the eyes of the present. Shimmering in blue, she was challenging me in a way I asked to be challenged from the start. Her tear indicated an openness I’ve never been able to lean into, until now.

It came to me, hours later, that it was us—together—looking into the emotion from the edge. Observing how the past has shaped us, vulnerable enough to walk through the paces together. No one said it was easy, the play between expansion and actuality.

But there we were.

The truth is that we have no ultimate control over what happens to us in this life. Therefore, to feel naked and vulnerable is to be in direct contact with reality.

Instead of trying to ward off his pain, which is futile anyway, the lover can use it to transform himself, to develop invincible tenderness and compassion.

We must practice beginner’s mind.

– Journey of the Heart by John Welwood

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